The Times has an article on two dads who adopted a son: Same sex adoption: our new life as Dad and Daddy. The article goes through the experience of two dads who adopted a three year old boy through the UK Government. They call it an 18 month blind date arranged by social workers - very apt and very much what we are experiencing.
One of the facts that intrigued me in the article concerned adoption leave:
Part of the reason that Scott appears to have settled in with us so well is no doubt down to the fact that my partner Michael was able to take a year’s adoption leave from his job as a teacher. Adoption laws changed in 2005, allowing same-sex couples to decide who should be the primary adopter, and receive the equivalent of maternity leave. With Michael’s employer, it worked out at a year off work on just over half pay, and it has been invaluable.
That's a nice perk and something I haven't heard of in BC. Then again, I'm self employed and a year of adoption leave is possible, it just means I don't get paid for a year.
I wonder if one day this will be all normal. Adoption leave, gay adoption, two dads ... just another facet of a family.
Aug 18, 2009
Aug 13, 2009
Holding Pattern
I'm in a holding pattern. Adoption school doesn't start for another month or so. I've coached all my friends through their ten page reference questions (coached as in provided moral support, rather than answers!). We've started the process of looking at houses in better neighbourhoods (I deemed this necessary the other day when I saw a couple outside our window having sex). We've talked to a few other couples that have done this sort of thing - with good results. We've told our families and friends. And now we wait ...
One of the things about this process that I have found most surprising is the lack of similar experiences in the internet. We were fortunate enough to have found a couple of dads locally that were willing to talk with us but when we first thought about this I went to the internet for help and found pretty well nothing. If I have a question about my car - the internet - about a movie - the internet - what to cook for dinner - the internet - a health question - the internet. But when I looked for other dads that had done this - almost nothing.
I did find William and John's blog and website and facebook page. All those dreamy blue eyes, I don't know if I can compete. They've found a birth mother though and stopped posting a few months back. And there are other dads that had previous families (more like a Brady Bunch thing) but something like what we are going through seems internet rare. Have you run across anything we should be reading? Had a similar experience?
One of the things about this process that I have found most surprising is the lack of similar experiences in the internet. We were fortunate enough to have found a couple of dads locally that were willing to talk with us but when we first thought about this I went to the internet for help and found pretty well nothing. If I have a question about my car - the internet - about a movie - the internet - what to cook for dinner - the internet - a health question - the internet. But when I looked for other dads that had done this - almost nothing.
I did find William and John's blog and website and facebook page. All those dreamy blue eyes, I don't know if I can compete. They've found a birth mother though and stopped posting a few months back. And there are other dads that had previous families (more like a Brady Bunch thing) but something like what we are going through seems internet rare. Have you run across anything we should be reading? Had a similar experience?
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